A few weeks ago, I was working on my book proposal and emailing it back and forth with my agent. My agent—every time I say that I feel like I did when I was first engaged and peppered my conversations with my fiancé.
In one of the emails, I wrote, “I just want to make sure I’m on the right path.” This part of the proposal was new to me, and I was worried I was doing it completely wrong.
My agent, (sorry couldn’t help myself) responded, “You ARE on the right path.”
Now, I’m pretty sure he was only referring to the small section of the proposal we were working on, so I didn’t ask if he also meant my writing career as a whole. I decided I would accept the double meaning as encouragement because I’ll take assurance anywhere I can find it these days even if that means reading into a simple phrase. But, I mean, he did emphasize the ARE.
Doubt is my new favorite sin. It used to be worry, but for the most part, I’ve beaten that monster down with prayer and realization of God’s provision in my life. I know doubting means I’m not being faithful, but what if this writing thing isn’t what God wants me to do. I know in my logical brain that He has shown me over and over that I am on the right path.
The ugly doubt monster loves to whisper in my ear. “Maybe, this is all about demonstrating perseverance for your children, or perhaps, it is about connecting people who you meet to further the Kingdom. Like connecting writer friends with the Women’s Ministries Director at my church. It might not be about you publishing books at all, so why are you wasting all this time?”
But my God is bigger and stronger and more faithful than the doubt monster. He orchestrates my successes with disappointments to lessen the blow. He helps me see the side benefits of following his plan. So I can be on the right path and enjoy the people I meet and the sights along the way. This writing journey isn’t just about me being a published author. God’s vision is never that narrow. I love seeing how he is using my writing journey to help other writers and speakers, to prepare me for His work, and to shower blessings on people I barely know.
I praise God for his long-suffering patience and his faithfulness. “His word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.” (Psalm 119:105) If I seek Him first and His righteousness, all these things will be given to me. (Matthew 6:33) Because I see how he clothes the grass of the fields and takes care of the birds of the sky, I know he is leading me right where he wants me with all I need to succeed. (Matthew 6:26, 28-30) For I am “confident of this, that He who began a good work in me will carry it to completion.” (Philippians 1:6)
So take that Doubt monster!
What are your doubts? How do you deal with them? Comment below. I’d love to continue this conversation with you.